Creating Anything

Creating feels like such an overused word.  Maybe because it's now associated with "content creator" and even saying "I am creating something" sounds pompous and ridiculous.  Or maybe it feels vain to say "I'm creative".  I don't know.  But I'm using it anyway.  

In my quest to not be consumed by mindlessness I have been listening to more videos about pushing back against our natural inclination to fall into time wasting.  Videos that talk about how much time we spend on our phones, how much time that adds up to in a week, a year, etc.  It's pretty gross, and not what I want for my life.  Yesterday I spent almost an hour in more or less silence (kids were reading or outside) trimming quilt blocks.  No music, no audio, not much talking to anyone.  Being alone with my thoughts.  To be really honest it was very boring at first.  Usually I am at the very least listening to music, if not having multiple conversations with the kids while doing repetitive super boring tasks.  I repeatedly wanted to turn on something, anything to listen to.  But I did not.  About thirty minutes in it stopped being boring.  My mind almost seemed to accept its fate and just chill.  Because I have continually fed my brain stimulus for the past one million years, it wants that.  It NEEDS that.  While I am not swearing off stuff like that, I want to also be comfortable just being silent.  It will be hard.

In the end I was really happy that I had spent the time to trim the quilt blocks.  They were small and tedious (160 2.5" blocks) but in the end I had something.  Something I created.  Created out of leftovers from another project which feels especially good.  An hour I would have otherwise lost to the phone.  To seeing what other people were creating/consuming.

This morning I knew I needed to make sandwich bread (we are out) and shape and transfer my sourdough, so I figured I would try a new homemade sourdough noodles recipe I had seen as well.  Because why not?  I feel like I am the kind of person who once I start doing things, I am prone to keep going.  But if I never start, I accomplish absolutely nothing.  And I've been in a do nothing/the bare minimum for a long time and it's detrimental to my mental health/happiness.  So here's to more creating.  Creating literally anything.  Fabric creations, noodles, bread, whatever.  There is something about having an end product that says "look, I made this!" that is satisfying.  Even if we immediately eat it. 

P.S. My noodles are so ugly but they taste delicious.



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